“You know, normally, I’d say don’t quit your day job, but, in this case, I will make an exception.” — JON STEWART

“During the same speech, President Trump told CNN reporter Kaitlan Collins to ‘smile more.’ OK, did you ever think she just doesn’t smile around you? That’s like saying ‘My wife never orgasms.’ Maybe she isn’t the problem.” — SETH MEYERS

“My favorite thing about that was Wolf Blitzer kept looking over, like, ‘You want me to [expletive] him up? I’ll go [expletive] him up.’” — JON STEWART

The Bits Worth Watching

Kaitlan Collins appeared happy to chat with Jon Stewart on Monday’s “Daily Show.”

Keke Palmer will sit down with her “Password” co-host, Jimmy Fallon, on Tuesday’s “Tonight Show.”

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