SAN DIEGO — So much for those five regular-season wins.

So much for the 55 runs, the 23-3 humiliation in July and all the evidence the Chicago Cubs could carry into October suggesting they had the San Diego Padres’ number.

But numbers don’t mean everything, and not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted. So on Tuesday night, the Padres started their own count. 

One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. 

San Diego opened the NL Wild Card Series with an emphatic 8-0 victory over Chicago at a roaring Petco Park, riding Michael King’s flirtation with history and first-inning thunder from Fernando Tatis Jr. and Manny Machado to move within one victory of returning the favor for last October’s elimination at Wrigley Field.

Everything expected this to be a close battle between two of baseball’s best teams. Instead it was an ambush. 

King carried a no-hitter into the seventh inning against the highest-scoring offense in baseball, suffocating the Cubs for 6 1/3 innings before Nico Hoerner finally broke up the no-no with a soft grounder to third base that Machado couldn’t field and throw cleanly, allowing Hoerner to reach on an infield single. 

By then, the damage had been done everywhere else.

King struck out Pete Crow-Armstrong and Alex Bregman back-to-back in a perfect first inning. Moments later, Tatis detonated Matthew Boyd’s first pitch of the night over the center-field wall.

Crow-Armstrong nearly brought it back, but nearly was about as close as Chicago got in this blowout of a baseball game. 

Four pitches into Machado’s first plate appearance, the Padres third baseman launched another homer and Petco Park was shaking beneath 47,084 fans, including actor Bill Murray.

Chicago’s offense limped into October and apparently brought the limp through airport security.

Crow-Armstrong, the presumptive NL MVP, went 0-for-3 with three strikeouts, and King struck out Chicago’s top two hitters — PCA and Bregman — six times in their first seven combined at-bats.

Meanwhile, Boyd’s previous problems against San Diego followed him into October.

Tatis walked in the third and Machado doubled him home for a 3-0 lead. Boyd departed after four innings having allowed five hits and four runs.

After that, the Padres turned Game 1 into batting practice. 

Xander Bogaerts supplied the evening’s loudest souvenir in the fourth, launching a no-doubt homer into the second deck of the Western Metal Supply Co. building.

Then San Diego ripped the game open with three runs in the fifth.

Jackson Merrill punched a two-run single through the right side with the bases loaded before a wild pitch brought home another run.

By then, this stopped resembling the tense three-game chess match everyone anticipated and started looking like San Diego was settling an old score.

The Padres were baseball’s hottest team over the final month and a half of the season. Tuesday offered compelling evidence that momentum didn’t disappear when the calendar flipped to October.

By the time fans sang “Take Me Out to the Ball Game,” the only drama left was whether Chicago could avoid the shutout.

They couldn’t.

San Diego native, Joe Musgrove, who has not pitched on a major league mound since the 2024 NL Wild Card series, made his triumphant return after two years and closed out the game.

What it means

The Padres needed to plant their flag immediately after Chicago took Game 1 at Wrigley last October.

Consider it planted.

San Diego is now one victory from advancing and gets Nick Pivetta in Game 2 Wednesday night. Even more importantly, the Padres never had to touch Adrián Morejón, Bradgley Rodriguez or Mason Miller.

Their three most dangerous bullpen weapons will be rested with Chicago’s season on the line.

Turning point

Tatis’ first-pitch home run.

King had just retired the Cubs in order when Tatis sent Boyd’s first offering toward the center-field wall.

The Cubs never recovered.

Did you see that?

Bogaerts didn’t simply homer in the fourth inning. He sent it to the moon.

His blast landed in the second deck of the Western Metal Supply Co. building, one of those home runs where the outfielder’s only responsibility is to turn around and admire the architecture.